Oh boy, I felt the travel bug this morning. You boys are keeping me…tired lately. I know I have some internal work to do but I feel like I need a vacation every day around…well this morning 9:00am but usually around noon….
I love you so stinking much. I can’t wait for you to be old enough to make a fun travel buddy or to be happy playing video games for a week while I take a spontaneous trip.
You hear all the time, “Soak up every stage”….You see, I’m grateful for each day, but I don’t forget the hard stuff quiet so easily as most.
“Taco Momma, I follow you around everywhere because I love you.”
4 year old James |
The words that melt my heart every time I’m on the brink of losing it.
Learning about my role as a Projector (Google human design. I recommend the Jovian Archive) has helped release so much mommy guilt and give reason to all the unique alone time I need to feel my best. I try and make sure our Mommy-Son dates are filled with dense happy memories.
Do you remember all the time we spent at the water park? All the time we spent playing in the back garden? All the time we spent practicing numbers and letters? I hope those memories outweigh the moments I lost it.
My heart hurts a little being tied down with you tiny vulnerable humans at home, but I know the adults you will evolve into and the lessons I learn being your Momma will be 100% worth every “please stop breathing on me” moment.
Thank you for your 5 gigabytes of Jamie selfies in my photo archive. Thank you for teaching me about consistency. Thank you for understanding when I need space…even if you only remember for 30 seconds. Thank you for finally being potty trained. Thank you for the 15 months of extended breastfeeding where I could provide you with something no one else could. (That was definitely emotional compensation for lacking every where else on my end. It worked for me. I hope it helped you, too.)
I love watching you play soccer, and baseball. I love watching you learn to use a DSLR. You’re the back button focusing king. Your vocabulary is insane. I can’t wait to read the papers you write in school. I can’t wait for you to learn how to swim! I hope you know I’m your #1 Fan.
I love you Jamie-Boy.
Please never stop calling me Taco Momma.
I hope you read this in 15 years and we’re best friends. Screw everyone who says I should always be your mom and not your friend….Cheers to beers in Germany and Second Shooting in Ireland. We’ll get there some day.
Love, Taco Momma
